Insightful political commentary
- Ethan: man the treaty of postdam must have been awkward for stalin
- Ethan: surrounded by a bunch of noobs talking about big boy stuff
- Me: yes, poor stalin
A poignant existence, part deux
- Ethan: I really need to start following her
- Ethan: my life lacks lulz
A poignant existence, part one
- Ethan: doing enviro notes is like fapping for me
True stories, recounted
- Bianca: oh and anotehr hting
- Bianca: what is your sn
- Me: you mean, what does it mean?
- Bianca: yeah
- Me: oh right yeah
- Me: well, one day i had a dream that zarathustra, diviner of the most ancient of monastic liturgy spoke to me
- Me: in this dream he said
- Me: he reached out his three-fingered left hand and said
- Me: with other hand placed upon his thigh, pulsing
- Me: :
- Me: "prashanth"
- Me: "you must"
- Me: "make your screenname thus"
- Me: and he arranged the leaves which were rippling softly on the ground into the pattern of letters which you see
- Me: knowing immediately that if i did not obey his command, my kin and ancestry would be cursed under ahura mazda's undying wrath
- Me: i duly proceeded to awake and register the screenname
- Me: to this day, when orion twinkles, i know that it is the smile of zoroaster, looking down upon me from across the millenia
- Bianca: FINE THEN I'LL JUST GOOGLE IT
- Bianca: HAHA wordie. org?
- Me: every instance of "koldewyse" on the internet is me
- Bianca: iii knowww
- Me: i'm telling you, zarathustra speaks to only the few
- Me: the one
- Me: the chosen
- Bianca: i'll give you a dollar if you tell em
- Bianca: *me
- Me: we'll have to continue this conversation irl it seems
- Me: for my interest is piqued
- Bianca: i can't believe you just abbreviated in real life
- Me: as ahura mazda himself once divined:
- Me: "if you don't abbreviate things, you're a square"
- Me: "iydatyas"
A friend named Dinkin
- Me: is dinkin even here?
- Ethan: nah, he's probably behind a dumpster sucking d for free
- Ethan: that's what I'd be doing if I were him, it's such a beautiful day outside
- Me: for FREE?
- Me: cmon bro
- Ethan: dinkin logs would do it
And now: a rare text post from the editor of Farce
I have noted that “narwhal” has become a point of repetition amongst my acquaintances. This must be studied further.
Lessons learned
- Ethan: oh narwhal dicks
- Ethan: I just got fb friended by the lady whose website I did
- (later)
- Me: MMM
- Me: poke her ass
- Ethan: ok
- Me: both literally and on facebook
- Ethan: oh
- Ethan: shit
- Ethan: this is what I get for closing windows prematurely, I guess
How to be a good member of society
- Kevin: damn narwhals its already 8:30
- Kevin: i have spent the last half hour watchign itunes music visualizer
We are so cultured
- Me: WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ON YOUR WHAT 16-20 HOUR FLIGHT
- Ray: SHIT
- Ray: it's gonna suck
- Me: that's not going to last that long
- Ray: it does when I do it
- Me: oh oh i see
- Me: no really though you should brush up on your sudoku so you can impress all the chinese women
- Ray: that's japan bro
- Me: THEY ALL PLAY THE SAME GAMES
- Ray: and my wide open eyes should be more than enough
- Me: they'll just think you're excited all the time
- Me: "look at that tourist"
- Me: "he is so excited to be in our country"
- Me: "let us convert him to maoism"
- Ray: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO
- Ray: I'll have to wave an american flag at all times
- Ray: to fend off the pinkos
Intelligent discourse
- Me: in other news, "niger" is such an unfortunate name for an african country
- Jessie: agreed
