Minutiae
- Duncan: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ACDSkCeEfWs
- Me: i wonder how many times he's opened that dictionary
Ah, this is so good
- Ray: YEAAAAAAH
- Ray: I got matt to look at thatsnotsexy
- Ray: I am the best
- Me: FUCK YES, HOW?
- Ray: not using tinyurl
- Ray: a different service
- Ray: look at his wall
- Ray: I'm
- Ray: so proud
- Me: how do you know he clicked it?
- Ray: haley is on the phone with him
- Ray: and he said he did
- Me: YES
- Me: high five
- Ray: high five accepted
- Ray: ah this is so good
- Me: how am i so completely sure your facial expression has not changed in the past hour?
- Ray: it actually did when I heard he clicked it
- Ray: my eye twitched a little
- Ray: I got it under control though
- Me: whoa, tiger
- Ray: I know
- Ray: it was pretty intense
Conclusions
- Hao: You only need two things to understand women: alcohol and a solid fist.
- Hao: SOLID DATING ADVICE by HAO LIAN
- Me: this is why you're alone and sad
Trolled, on a delay night
- Kevin: wait you favorited yourself
- Kevin: im pretty sure
- Kevin: you're doing it wrong
- Me: suck my fat dick
- Me: SCHOOL CANCELLED
- Me: FUCK YEAH
- Me: YESSSS
- Kevin: WOOOOOOOO
- Kevin: WOOOOOOOOO
- Me: i was lying
- Me: bitch
- Me: that's what you get
- Kevin: YOU FUCKING ASS
- Me: LOL
- Kevin: OH GOD
- Kevin: IM GONNA
- Me: I AM IRL LOL'ING
- Kevin: OH GOD
- Kevin: FUCK
- Kevin: GOD
- Kevin: FUCK
- Me: XD
- Me: this has made my night.
- Kevin: YOU LITTLE BROWN ASSHOLE
- Kevin: FUCK
- Kevin: AAAARRRTGHGHHH
- Kevin: FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
- Me: "kids these days, so easy to troll"
- Kevin: NO GOD DAMN IT
- Kevin: NO
- Kevin: NO
- Me: ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh god my erection is huge
- Kevin: I WILL
- Kevin: GOD DAMN IT
- Kevin: FUCK
- Kevin: GOD DAMN TROLLS ALL OVER THE GOD DAMN INTERNET FUCK SHIT
- Me: the troll has been trolled
- Me: coming to terms with himself
- Kevin: this isnt happening
- Kevin: god
- Kevin: I just had my troll cherry popped
- Kevin: and it was a violent, painful first
Astounding callousness
- Me: the english language is in a fetal position, whimpering
- Hao: My damaging influence on the English language is far surpassed by your ability to be a complete douchebag
- Me: *tears*
- Me: i was just quoting you
- Hao: DON'T MESS WITH HAO
- Me: I WAS JUST QUOTING YOU HAO
- Me: IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE THIS WAY BETWEEN US
- Hao: THAT'S BACKSASS
- Me: IT COULD BE BETTER
- Me: IT COULD BE BETTER, YOU KNOW
- Me: but no
- Me: all you can do is destroy
- Me: i build, and you destroy
- Me: i'm... frankly, i don't know what to do anymore
- Hao: I see the errors of my way now
- Hao: It's time to realize that I love you
- Hao: now taste my man lips
- Me: oh
- Me: this has gone too far
- Me: I MUST ALAS CUT IT OFF
- Hao: That's what she said
- Hao: YES YES YES
- Me: that's the punchline to a jewish rabbi joke somewhere
- Me: mine was better
- Me: more innovative and cutting edge
- Hao: Like your love-making, yours was the slower one
- Me: but it left a better impression
- Hao: Whereas mine was thrustful
- Hao: I like my women damaged after sex
- Hao: is that wrong?
- Hao: no
- Me: wait, having a quick love-making is never a GOOD thing hao
- Me: therefore
- Me: bad analogy
- Hao: Quick means you get to do it more than once
- Hao: and with another person
- Me: it'll have to be with another person, because the original person will be angry and shortchanged
- Me: love tips by prashanth
- Hao: and half-conscious
- Hao: If I did my job right
- Hao: They don't call me Chloroform for nothing
- Me: your callousness is astounding, and you should be ashamed of yourself
- Hao: Shame is for people with vaginas
- Hao: I wish there were a shorter noun for that
- Hao: But there isn't so that's that
Freestyle beats
- Susan: so are you coming or what?
- Susan: i don't like the whole "maybe" business
- Me: possible, i might or might not be busy that night
- Me: i mean i'll try to come but it's not in my hands
- Me: OH MY GOD THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID
- Me: HOLY SHIT THAT WAS EXCELLENT
- Me: that is all
- Susan: .
- Susan: okay, that was pretty good
At 12:30 on a Monday night before classes (he is the whitest person alive)
- Ethan: night kudzu
- Ethan: wait nah
- Ethan: imma listen to some down tempo music for a little
- Me: lol wut da eff
- Ethan: and sip tea
- Me: are you srs
- Ethan: yes, yes I am
- Me: if you sip tea this late, you will not be able to sleep
- Ethan: caffeine free
Literary techniques
- Me: i think i might just dipset and procrastinate until monday
- Ethan: I have to finish this lady's website
- Me: lolololol
- Ethan: that's what I'm going to end up doing too
- Ethan: miserable monday
- Ethan: classic, respectable
- Ethan: assonance
- Me: consonance
- Ethan: I meant alliteration
- Ethan: but I really wanted to type, "I'm here to put the ass back in assonance."
- Me: classic, respectable
A look into a tortured mind
- Ethan: kid's a little trigger happy, eh bonerbo?
- Me: I'M BROWN AND THAT IS RACIST
- Me: oh you are clever without bounds
- Ethan: boner bo could be a circus act
- Ethan: clown with massive dong
- Ethan: contorts his penor instead of balloons
- Ethan: makes kids cry
- Me: those last few lines are a testament to your state of mind
- Ethan: I'd be lying if I said I didn't have an erection
The sincerest form of flattery
- Hiral: i always look to your twitter page for short, witty phrases
